College For Idiots: Cooking

Ingredients:
-Pasta Noodles: as many as you want
-Salad Dressing: I prefer Italian dressing
-Vegetables
-Parmesan Cheese
-Mozzarella

Directions:
-It's pretty simple, so simple my fat lazy cat can make it. I can also cook it without burning anything or blowing anything up in the microwave.
-First, you boil the noodles. Hard, right?
-Cool the boiled noodles under cold water.
-Add the dressing, as much as you want.
-Cut up the Vegetables, tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, and broccoli, whatever.
-Add the cheese.

There you go what a nice meal. Granted your breath will smell really bad so people probably won't want to make out with you afterwards but no biggie.

Stuffed Shells (serves about four or two for more than one meal)

Ingredients:
1 egg
16 oz. Ricotta Cheese
1 box of raw noodle shells
1 pound of ground beef
1 can of spaghetti sauce
1 bag shredded mozzarella

Directions:

-First Boil Water: amount depends on how many noodles you want to make
-Add the noodles to the water once it reaches a boil
-While noodles are cooking begin to brown the ground beef (use a frying pan)
-Remove noodles from water when they are semi cooked, too soft and you won't be able to stuff them
-Take the meat off the burner
-Add the meat to the sauce set aside
-Let the noodles cool
-Mix 16 oz. of ricotta with one egg
-Add mozzarella to the cheese for taste (as much as you want)
-Stuff the shells with the cheese; about one spoonful
-Place shells in a 13" by 9" glass baking pan
-Pour sauce over the shells
-Put tinfoil over the pan
-Bake at 350 for 25 minutes

And there you go you have a fancy meal that will get you laid. Add some wine and maybe some frozen vegetables and bread and the most dateable person will look attractive. Good luck!

P.S. I would love input on my recipes and recipes of your own. I have done all of these multiple times but new spices or ideas are welcome! Leave a comment!

As always this meal is going to taste like chicken. However, now your chicken is a little spiced up. So, here it goes:

Ingredients:
-Apricot Preserves
-Chicken Breasts
-Frozen Mixed Vegetables

Directions:
-Cook the chicken in your oven on 350 for 25 minutes or you can cook it
for 8 minutes on your George Foreman.
-Remove chicken and rub a generous helping of the apricot preserves on
it. Leave a little on the side for dipping if you really like the
preserves like I do.
-Take your bag of frozen vegetables cook it in the microwave then let
it sit.

Congratulations you made a very tasty, quick meal. If you chose to use your oven though I'm then sorry. You are a retard. You while now have to wait thirty minutes for your dinner biatch.

Spinach Salad

Ingredients:
Spinach
Pre-cooked chicken
Tomatoes
Salad Dressing (I like Greek with the already added Feta cheese)

Directions:
Easy, combine it all together

P.S Pre-cooked chicken is wonderful, absolutely wonderful. It makes life a lot easier than having to spend the time to cook chicken.

Ingredients:
Chicken Strips (they cook faster than breasts)
Plain Seasoned Bread Crumbs
Mustard (Honey, Brown, Original, or whatever you like)

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 325 for strips and 350 for breasts
Pour mustard on a plate, as much as you think you will need to cover the chicken
Coat the chicken with the mustard (use a pastry brush if you have one, if not just smear the mustard on)
Pour the breading on to a plate and roll the chicken around in the breading until fully coated
Then place in the oven for 25 minutes or until done

For a side dish I suggest Uncle Ben’s rice. It cooks pretty quickly and there are tons of flavors you can pick.

In the mood for a quick desert that tastes really good and will make everyone else think you are insanely awesome make cannoli. If you don't know what that is, it is an Italian desert.

Ingredients:
Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips (as many as you want)
3 cups: Ricotta Cheese
1 1/4 cups: Powdered Sugar
Cannoli Shells (1 or more packages)
1 tsp: Vanilla Extract (optional)

Directions:
Mix Ricotta Cheese and Powdered Sugar together until mixture is smooth. Add as many chocolate chips as you want. Fill the pre-cooked shells with the mixture. Keep the Cannoli refrigerated.

Ta da, you have a super fancy desert now. Isn't that just wonderful? You are now a cooking genius, a savant really.